Helping a stranger can be easier than advising someone we've known forever. When friends and family ask for advice, it is more complicated. To give better advice, try less fixing and more listening.
You should stay open if you can. Keep your hands free. Keep your face neutral and try to avoid looks of shock or judgment. If you look like you're tense or you're distracted, the person might not open up to you as much as you would want them to.
You can't always give advice right now. Texts and FaceTime might be immediate, but your advice doesn't have to be. You can politely explain to someone that you want to give them your full attention when you're ready.
You don't have to fix the problem. People who ask "What should I do?" often want to process a problem themselves. A friend's priorities might not match your own, but that doesn't mean they're wrong.
Pay attention to patterns. When you've known someone for years, you're a witness to their patterns and repeated mistakes. Instead of saying, "Ugh, you've said this 15, 000 times," you can ask questions. "What do you think that means?" or "" can be a good one when you're trying to get someone to consider their own cycle.
A. Body language matters.
B. Listen to them carefully.
C. What's wrong with you?
D. What has worked for you before?
E. Otherwise, you can do more harm than good.
F. If we don't get it right, we could hurt someone we love.
G. You're giving good advice if you can help them get there on their own.
