Life isn't fair. Some people just seem blessed with the ability to effortlessly charm anyone they meet. Well, it might seem like a magical power, but in fact there are a number of factors at work. The answer is: to a large extent, yes you can.
But first, the bad news. People initially judge each other based purely on physical appearance. With just a glimpse of a face, people make snap judgments about each other's likability, trustworthiness and confidence. How should we deal with this? People perceive a smiling face as more trustworthy, warmer and sociable. It sounds like common sense, doesn't it? Smile and others will smile with you.
What other tricks might we have? Consequently, three things we can do to signal that we are not a threat are to: raise our eyebrows quickly, tilt (仰起) our heads slightly, and once again, to smile.
So we've looked at body language, but of course what you say is hugely important too, unless you want to just stand there grinning foolishly. The golden rule of friendship is if you make people feel good about themselves, they're going to like you. In other words, you should not talk about yourself and all your wonderful achievements.
Finally, finding common ground is good to form a connection. Charming people are particularly skilled at seeking out shared interests or experiences to bond with others. Simple things like asking where someone's from really can open up a discussion and allow you to find areas in common. And if all else fails, you can fall back on that most British of topics: the weather.
A. So, can you learn to develop superhuman charm?
B. Shared interests are the key to making connections with others.
C. What good tricks can we employ to become charming?
D. Our brains often survey the environment for friend or enemy signals.
E. It can be a nice start of a conversation.
F. Instead, you need to show interest in them.
G. There's one incredibly simple tool: your smile.
